"Bruce" is my cat. Not our cat, but my cat. Eric is not always very fond of Bruce - especially in the winter when Bruce paws at the door wanting food all the time. But I can appreciate Bruce. And I think, slowly, Eric is beginning to appreciate him too.
Bruce was a stray cat that I adopted on a whim. I didn't name him Bruce - that is the name he came with and I didn't bother to change it, even though I think it is a silly name for a cat. I think the only reason why I took him was because he stood up against George. Therefore, in my mind, he qualified as "a good cat". He doesn't run away from dogs, he stands his ground. But, he is also very tolerant and will accept George's overly affectionate behaviour for several minutes until he thinks "enough is enough" and gives George "The Paw", claws extended, as a friendly warning not to proceed any further.
Bruce is a 100% outdoor cat. He has never set foot in our house and that's just the way it is. He is well-fed and has shelter and fresh water at all times and can survive outdoors just fine. He is tough. He "bulks up" for the winter. Eric was very concerned about this the first winter Bruce was with us. He said "Bruce is getting amazingly fat - aren't you going to do something about that? - You can't feed him so much - it's not healthy". I said, "Its OK - all outdoor cats do this - Just wait - he'll slim down in the spring - I have to feed him so he can stay warm". Sure enough, by April Bruce was as svelt as ever and looked long and sleek again. Eric said "Bruce lost an amazing amount of weight - he looks good again!".
Bruce is an exceptional hunter. Really, he is above average in this department. We know this as a fact because he likes to bring home his trophies. Even the "big game" ones. We knew all along that he was a sporting cat, because of the mice and birds strewn around the front step on a regular basis during the summer, but it wasn't until he left us a large rat that we really began to appreciate his hunting capabilities. Eric said, "Well, I guess if he kills rats then he is a pretty good cat."
We still were not sure just how much hunting Bruce was doing in the winter though. Eric was skeptical and thought he eats too much cat food to be doing any real hunting. I agreed somewhat. We were not worried though because just a few days ago we saw a large brown weasel-like creature in the barn, and thought - great! We must not have too many rats if there are big weasels living here! (We are perfectly OK with a weasel living in the barn - and I am not entirely sure it is a weasel even though it looks like a weasel to me - its about the size of a big gopher and its brown with a long body and very sharp teeth - it could be a marten - I think weasels are supposed to be white in the winter - anyways, I'm going to call it a weasel).
Well, it is now a fact - Bruce does hunt in the winter. I think purely for sport actually. We know this because Bruce brought home his biggest trophy ever - the big brown weasel! Yup, right to our front doorstep. It was there when I got home from work today, before I let the dogs out. And boy did it stink!!! And so did Bruce! He smelled like he rolled around in a big puddle of tomcat pee and he looked a little "ruffled up". Thanks, Bruce. After doing a little reading on the internet I discovered that these little creatures can smell worse than a skunk. I would agree. I threw it across the river to the other side, where hopefully the dogs will not find it.
And that is how Bruce came to be known as Bruce Almighty.
